Empty

Have you ever wonder why sometimes you feel so alone even when you are surrounded with people that you loved? This is how I felt most of the time nowadays. Not sure it is because my thyroid medication was changed recently, or my period is coming, or even this is how I really feel without any other reason to add to it. Sitting in front of my sliding door, with a view of a vast field and lovely mountains, I took a deep breath. Thinking about it, my life story pretty much was an envied version to most of the people. I have a lovely husband who is really handsome, a beautiful son who is smart, a lovely dog that wags her tail every time when I’m home, and a place to call home with a peaceful and beautiful view. Living abroad with 4 seasons to experienced, different culture and different people to meet, clean air, green grass and wild animal nearby, what more can I ask for? This is really a funny thing because, human has a tendency to self destruct and reconstruct ourselves. We destroyed what we should be appreciated of, and reconstruct it back because we felt stupid to even destroy it. What a waste of time. I never can put it rationally because it is really beyond my capability to rationalise it. Every thing I wrote so far, seems so contradicting. I guess, this is how I felt. Perhaps I do not need any reason to feel this way, or perhaps I should just let it pass. I do not know.